[participant in the Royal Road Writathon challenge]

It's been over forty years since the world was destroyed by a terrible apocalypse; more than sixty percent of all humans died in the first few.

The year is 2064, toilet paper is currency, all the rich people fled to mars in space-travelling electric cars and the exposure to 5G radiation turned many species around the world into strange, unfamiliar mutants. Those that didn't instantly die from the autism inflicted by the 5G rad-storms sweeping across the globe had a chance to develop the ability to control viruses.

From making yourself stronger, faster or making your neighbour shit their guts out and die, all this became possible at the cost of consuming the radiation in the air.

As such, wielding such abilities is prohibited and punishable by incineration. In such a harsh world lives a man with a singular goal, he needs to reach the north pole,

Disclaimer : This story is designed for laughs, if you A; came here for a serious discussion / display of views concerning the current situation or B; don't find the pandemic funny, this MAY not be the story for you.