Only Villains Do That

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While waiting on an Akihabara train platform one day, ordinary high schooler Yoshi Shinonome was suddenly plucked from his normal life in Japan and whisked away by a beautiful goddess to Ephemera, a world of magic and adventure, to serve as her Hero and drive back the evil Dark Lord.

This is not his story.

Standing nearby at the moment Yoshi was isekai'd was a man named Seiji - a rude, cranky, misanthropic musician who was not at all pleased to find himself also snatched up and transported to Ephemera by the goddess's wicked sister, Virya. According to this self-proclaimed Goddess of Evil, the whole fantasy adventure thing was a game she and her sister played to stave off the boredom of immortality, and since the good goddess, Sanora, had picked her Hero...well, Virya needed a Dark Lord.

A grown man with his own career and ambitions, Seiji has no interest in playing. Unfortunately for him, the call to adventure was not a request. Now, he must conquer Ephemera and defeat the Hero...or Virya promises to make him beg for the release of death before granting it. Playing along for his own survival, Seiji nonetheless is under no illusions who his true enemy is, and it's not the naive young would-be Hero from his own world.

Placed in an impossible position, Seiji must make enough progress toward world domination to keep his sadistic patron goddess off his back, but not so much that he can't strike an accord with the forces of Good and convince the Hero Yoshi that it's the goddesses who are their mutual enemy. Forced to embrace Evil without being too evil, Seiji walks the razor's edge, building his forces and biding his time till he can get revenge on the goddesses and be free of them, his only certainty that he will not be getting out of this with his hands clean.

A Dark Lord's gotta do what a Dark Lord's gotta do.

Updates Tuesday and Friday.

Most Patreon tiers get to read one chapter in advance of the public release!

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225 d, 21 h ago Probably stalled or dropped!
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  • Only Villains Do That
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https://www.royalroad.com/fiction/40182/only-villains-do-that

Releases found: 195

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Series Releases:

Latest release - vol. 2.0, ch. 5.0
View Series Vol Chap Extra Group/Host
Only Villains Do That 2 5 2.5 In Which the Dark Lord gets the Lay of the Land
Only Villains Do That 2 4 2.4 In Which the Dark Lord Passes Judgment
Only Villains Do That 194 Only Villains Do That RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 193 4.47 In Which the Dark Lord Calls Upon the Goddess RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 192 4.46 In Which the Dark Lord Sends Other People's Plans Awry RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 191 4.45 In Which the Dark Lord's Plans Go Awry RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 190 Bonus 16: In Which the Hero Picks the Wrong Place to Put His Foot Down RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 189 4.44 In Which the Dark Lord Doesn't Get to Be the Center of Attention RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 188 4.43 In Which the Dark Lord Doesn't Make the Rules RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 187 4.42 In Which the Dark Lord Courts Death RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 186 4.41 In Which the Dark Lord Comes Back with a Warrant RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 185 4.40 In Which the Dark Lord Returns RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 184 4.39 In Which the Dark Lord Reflects on the Eve of Battle RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 183 4.38 In Which the Dark Lord Sets Up His Pieces RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 182 4.37 In Which the Dark Lord Has Issues With the Women in His Life RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 181 4.36 In Which the Dark Lord Weaves a Tangled Web RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 180 4.35 In Which the Dark Lord Barks Up the Right Tree RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 179 4.34 In Which the Dark Lord Hurts Some Feelings RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 178 4.33 In Which the Dark Lord Keeps Up With the Aelthwyns RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 177 4.32 In Which the Dark Lord Receives an Invitation RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 176 4.31 In Which the Dark Lord Finds a Weak Spot RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 175 4.30 In Which the Dark Lord Has Had Enough RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 174 4.29 In Which the Dark Lord Deals in Absolutes RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 173 4.28 In Which the Dark Lord Finds a Familiar Face RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 172 4.27 In Which the Dark Lord Falls For It RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 171 4.26 In Which the Dark Lord Terrorizes the Help RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 170 4.25 In Which the Dark Lord Intrudes RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 169 4.24 In Which the Dark Lord Has His Ups and Downs RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 168 4.23 In Which the Dark Lord Sponsors a Team-Building Activity RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 167 4.22 In Which the Dark Lord's Expertise Comes in Handy RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 166 4.21 In Which the Dark Lord Makes His Case RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 165 4.20 In Which the Dark Lord Knows Who's Been Naughty or Nice RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 164 4.19 In Which the Dark Lord Tells the Truth RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 163 4.18 In Which the Dark Lord Gets His Way RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 162 4.17 In Which the Dark Lord's Good Mood is Spoiled RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 161 Bonus 15: In Which the Gears Begin to Turn RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 160 Bonus 14: In Which the Captain Treads Lightly RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 159 Bonus 13: In Which a Queen Wields a Blade RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 158 4.16 In Which the Dark Lord Gets Told RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 157 4.15 In Which the Dark Lord is Thwarted RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 156 4.14 In Which the Dark Lord Feels a Chill Run Down His Spine RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 155 4.13 In Which the Dark Lord Makes a House Call RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 154 4.12 In Which the Dark Lord is Off to the Races RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 153 4.11 In Which the Dark Lord Ruins a Party RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 152 4.10 In Which the Dark Lord Catches Up RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 151 4.9 In Which the Dark Lord Threads the Needle RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 150 4.8 In Which the Dark Lord Gets a Handout RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 149 4.7 In Which the Dard Lord Isn't Even the Most Dramatic Person in the Room RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 149 4.7 In Which the Dark Lord Isn't Even the Most Dramatic Person in the Room RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 148 4.6 In Which the Dark Lord Lays Down the Law, Again RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 147 4.5 In Which the Dark Lord Throws Them a Bone RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 146 4.4 In Which the Dark Lord Hosts RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 145 4.3 In Which the Dark Lord Herds Cats RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 144 4.2 In Which the Dark Lord Musters his Forces RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 143 4.1 In Which the Dark Lord Actually Does RPG Stuff for a Change RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 142 3.34 In Which the Dark Lord Plays Queenmaker RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 141 3.33 In Which the Dark Lord Takes Over RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 140 3.32 In Which the Dark Lord Yields RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 139 3.31 In Which the Dark Lord Almost Wins RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 138 Bonus 12 In Which the Party Greets the Guest of Honor RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 137 3.30 In Which the Dark Lord Goes to Hell and Gets a Souvenir RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 136 Bonus 11 In Which the Boss Leans In RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 135 3.29 In Which the Dark Lord Unburdens Himself RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 134 Bonus 10 In Which the Lads Unravel a Mystery RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 133 3.28 In Which the Dark Lord Signs Up for Disaster RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 132 3.27 In Which the Dark Lord Tries Diplomacy RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 131 3.26 In Which the Dark Lord Receives a Delivery RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 130 3.25 In Which the Dark Lord's Personnel Decisions Come Under Scrutiny RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 129 3.24 In Which the Dark Lord Gets Schooled RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 128 3.23 In Which the Dark Lord is Too Late RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 127 3.22 In Which the Dark Lord Gets a Warm Welcome RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 126 3.21 In Which the Dark Lord Confronts His Nemesis RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 125 3.20 In Which the Dark Lord Rethinks His Position RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 124 3.19 In Which the Dark Lord Lays it All Out RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 123 Bonus 9: In Which the Scout Commences Counter-Revolutionary Activities RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 122 3.18 In Which the Dark Lord Comes to the Bridge and Blows It Up RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 121 3.17 In Which the Dark Lord Will Cross that Bridge When He Comes to It RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 120 3.16 In Which the Dark Lord Gets a Second Opinion RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 119 3.15 In Which the Dark Lord Presses the Big Red Button RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 118 3.14 In Which the Dark Lord Does the Right Thing, Sort Of RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 117 3.13 In Which the Dark Lord Bends the Knee RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 116 3.12 In Which the Dark Lord Gets No Respect RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 115 3.11 In Which the Dark Lord Gets the Bad News RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 114 3.10 In Which the Dark Lord Keeps the Peace RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 113 3.9 In Which the Dark Lord Shakes on It RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 112 3.8 In Which the Dark Lord Gets Taken For a Ride RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 111 3.7 In Which the Dark Lord Cleans Up RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 110 3.6 In Which the Dark Lord Makes the Call RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 109 3.5 In Which the Dark Lord Helps RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 108 3.4 In Which the Dark Lord Finds His Sparkle RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 107 3.3 In Which the Dark Lord Has an Idea. An Awful Idea. The Dark Lord Has a Wonderful, Awful Idea RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 106 3.2 In Which the Dark Lord Descends RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 105 3.1 In Which the Dark Lord Steps in It RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 104 Bonus 8 In Which Aster Has to Instigate the Talk RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 103 Bonus 7: In Which the Chancellor Schemes RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 102 Bonus 6: In Which the Ranger Springs a Trap RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 101 Coda: In Which the Call is Heard RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 100 2.45 In Which the Dark Lord Wears the Pants in the Relationship RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 99 2.44 In Which the Dark Lord Loses Patience RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 98 2.43 In Which the Dark Lord Catches a Break RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 97 2.42 In Which the Dark Lord Gives Peace a Chance RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 96 2.41 In Which the Dark Lord Puts His Foot Down RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 95 2.40 In Which the Dark Lord Destroys RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 94 2.39 In Which the Dark Lord Gets Some Help RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 93 2.38 In Which the Dark Lord Leaves an Offering RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 92 2.37 In Which the Dark Lord Catches Up on the Gossip RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 91 2.36 In Which the Dark Lord Carries a Big Shtick RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 90 2.35 In Which the Dark Lord Speaks Softly RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 89 2.34 In Which the Dark Lord Has Questions RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 88 2.33 In Which the Dark Lord Realizes He Should Dial it Back and then Doesn't RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 87 2.32 In Which the Dark Lord Gets Cut Down to Size RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 86 2.31 In Which the Dark Lord Battens Down the Hatches RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 85 2.30 In Which the Dark Lord Gets His Hands Dirty RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 84 2.29 In Which the Dark Lord Rages Against the Machine RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 83 2.28 In Which the Dark Lord Enrolls Some Nobles in the School of Hard Knocks RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 82 2.27 In Which the Dark Lord Goes Visiting RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 81 2.26 In Which the Dark Lord Spills the Tea RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 80 2.25 In Which the Dark Lord Comes to Dinner RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 79 2.24 In Which the Dark Lord Gets to Know the Neighbors RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 78 2.23 In Which the Dark Lord Does Not Bring Home the Bacon RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 77 2.22 In Which the Dark Lord Lays Down the Law RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 76 2.21 In Which the Dark Lord Has His Work Cut Out for Him RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 75 2.20 In Which the Dark Lord Confronts the Face of Evil RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 74 2.19 In Which the Dark Lord Spreads it Around RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 73 2.18 In Which the Dark Lord Seizes the Means of Abduction RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 72 2.17 In Which the Dark Lord Closes In RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 71 2.16 In Which the Dark Lord Suffers the Little Children RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 70 2.15 In Which the Dark Lord Realizes His Mistake RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 69 2.14 In Which the Dark Lord is the Lesser Evil RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 68 2.13 In Which the Dark Lord Learns About Unintended Consequences RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 67 2.12 In Which the Dark Lord Uses Someone's Tragic Backstory as a Sleep Aid RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 66 2.11 In Which the Dark Lord is Adopted by a Pack of Feral Noblewomen RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 65 2.10 In Which the Dark Lord Tries Something He Saw in a Movie Once RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 64 2.9 In Which the Dark Lord Almost Gets Away With It RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 63 2.8 In Which the Dark Lord Avoids at Least One Cliche RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 62 2.7 In Which the Dark Lord Has a Brilliant Idea RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 61 2.6 In Which the Dark Lord Outsmarts Himself and No One is Surprised RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 58 2.3 In Which the Dark Lord Plays to a Captive Audience RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 57 2.2 In Which the Dark Lord Makes it Rain RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 56 2.1 In Which the Dark Lord Gazes Into the Abyss RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 55 Bonus 5 In Which the Hero Falls RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 54 1.50 In Which the Dark Lord is Just Getting Started RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 53 1.49 In Which the Dark Lord Shows a Lady a Good Time RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 52 1.48 In Which the Dark Lord Takes a Leap of Faith RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 51 1.47 In Which the Dark Lord Breaks and Enters and Breaks RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 50 1.46 In Which the Dark Lord Lets the Hate Flow Through Him RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 49 1.45 In Which the Dark Lord Sends a Message RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 48 1.44 In Which the Dark Lord Needs a Nap RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 47 Bonus 4 In Which the Emperor Speaks to the Dead RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 46 1.43 In Which the Dark Lord Takes Responsibility for Once RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 45 1.42 In Which the Dark Lord Hunts for More Bears to Poke RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 44 1.41 In Which the Dark Lord Pokes the Bear RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 43 1.40 In Which the Dark Lord Baits the Hook RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 42 1.39 In Which the Dark Lord has Breakfast at Dusk RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 41 1.38 In Which the Dark Lord Repaints a Barn RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 40 1.37 In Which the Dark Lord Brings Down the House RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 39 1.36 In Which the Dark Lord Gets Cornered RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 38 Bonus 3 In Which the Broker Plays Both Ends Against the Middle RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 37 1.35 In Which the Dark Lord Stews in His Own Juices RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 36 1.34 In Which the Dark Lord Attempts to Civilize the Natives RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 35 1.33 In Which the Dark Lord Hangs Out with the Boys RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 34 1.32 In Which the Dark Lord Lights Up the Town RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 33 1.31 In Which the Dark Lord Passes the Time RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 32 1.30 In Which the Dark Lord Takes the Kids to the Park RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 31 1.29 In Which the Dark Lord Gets Played RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 30 1.28 In Which the Dark Lord Chews the Scenery RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 29 Bonus 2 In Which the Hero's Harem Go to Bible Study RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 28 1.27 In Which the Dark Lord Almost Makes a Spectacle of Himself RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 27 1.26 In Which the Dark Lord Gets Hot and Steamy with Aster RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 26 1.25 In Which the Dark Lord Unilaterally Declares Naptime RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 25 1.24 In Which the Dark Lord Gets Cooking RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 24 1.23 In Which the Dark Lord Wheels and Deals RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 23 1.22 In Which the Dark Lord Pets the Dog RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 22 1.21 In Which the Dark Lord Ministers to the Poor RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 21 1.20 In Which the Dark Lord Brings Refreshments RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 20 1.19 In Which the Dark Lord is Brought to Justice RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 19 Bonus 1 In Which the Paladin Gets the Party Started RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 18 1.18 In Which the Dark Lord Meets his Match RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 17 1.17 In Which the Dark Lord Plays with Fire RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 16 1.16 In Which the Dark Lord Gets Down to Business RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 15 1.15 In Which the Dark Lord is Responsible for a Workplace Safety Violation RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 14 1.14 In Which the Dark Lord Plans Ahead RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 13 1.13 In Which the Dark Lord Experiences the Horror of Self-Awareness RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 12 1.12 In Which the Dark Lord Takes a Level in Bard RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 11 1.11 In Which the Dark Lord Dresses for the Part RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 10 1.10 In Which the Dark Lord Immediately Unmakes a Friend RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 9 1.9 In Which the Dark Lord Makes a Friend RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 8 1.8 In Which the Dark Lord Goes to Town RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 7 1.7 In Which the Dark Lord Takes a Walk in the Woods RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 6 1.6 In Which the Dark Lord Meets the Gang RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 5 1.5 In Which the Dark Lord's Home is His Castle RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 4 1.4 In Which the Dark Lord Lets His Little Light Shine RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 3 1.3 In Which the Dark Lord has the Run of the Place RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 2 1.2 In Which the Dark Lord Bends Over Backwards RoyalRoadL
Only Villains Do That 1 1.1 In Which the Dark Lord Technically Doesn't Push a Girl in Front of a Train RoyalRoadL